Emotions….. They can be messy things. And often come up at inconvenient times!
But as Brene Brown says (I’m paraphrasing here) – you can’t just dampen one type of emotion. If you try to suppress one (such as sadness), you dampen them all.
So when we give our loving attention to our children, and play and laugh and have lots of fun, joy bubbles up. But so too does frustration, sadness, hurt, etc. When we give this gorgeous attention to our kids, it provides the opportunity for any upset feelings they have been carrying around, to come out.
And oh how they can come out….!
So if you’re thinking – “This Special Time is a lovely idea, but my child is getting more upset or having more tantrums afterwards so I don’t think it’s working properly” – please don’t despair! Tears and laughter are closely linked and both are fantastic stress release mechanisms, as I talk about in today’s video.
I’ve also created another video about how Special Time led to a big emotional upset/release for my daughter when she was 6, which in turn, led to her being so beautifully happy and – most importantly at the time(!) – incredibly ‘well behaved’!.
So how are your kids being with all of this attention?
And how are YOU finding it all? Tomorrow we’ll talk about why we can find it hard to do sometimes.
And finally – if you’re feeling that you’re ‘behind’ and just can’t find the time to do Special Time each day, PLEASE DON”T WORRY!! It IS hard to fit it in to our busy days. Hence why I’ve called it Mission: Impossible!
I haven’t been able to do it every day (and I’m running the bloomin’ thing!!).
But what I have found is that just having the intention to connect with my kids in this way has shifted things. I’ve become more playful, more flexible and less shouty. We are having more fun together, which is just gorgeous.
So, please be gentle on yourself and just do what you can. Doing something is better than just giving up and doing nothing!
So I hope you have a lovely day and I look forward to chatting with you again tomorrow.